ICS Daily Devotions
Our Spouse Is Our Only Soul Mate
Genesis 2:18, 23-24 (NKJV) And the Lord God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.”…. And Adam said: “This is now bone of my bones And flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, Because she was taken out of Man.” Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.
God has made an order in human relationship and in the marriage relationship; it is a deep horizontal relationship, specifically called a covenant marriage relationship. This means that the husband and wife are to be physically together when each leaves their parents and cleaves to their spouses. Our spouse is therefore our soul mate with whom we are the closest of friends to share openly without any secrets. We are supposed to engage our spouse in conversations that bind us together as one flesh besides sex. There are so many exchanges of the mind, thoughts and emotions that we become one. This creates a strong soul tie with our spouse. It also creates a strong bond, attachment and affection for each other. It is the knitting of two souls, which does not break easily because our emotional reservoir is constantly being topped up. When we are very emotionally attached to our spouse, it will feel like part of us has died when our spouse goes back to be with the Lord.
Neglecting this understanding that our spouse should be our only soul mate is very detrimental to our marriage. Some husbands or wives have friends that they would rather share their emotions, struggles and challenges with, but not with their own spouses. There is a soulish attachment to the other person. If this friend is of the opposite sex, this soulish attachment could lead to physical contact and to sin. It becomes very complicated because there is an emotional attachment and it is very hard to extract ourselves out of such sins because the soul is involved. The soul tie to the other person is emotional and what the person says affects us, which could even be in the form of emotional blackmail.
Some situations lead to conversations that are not edifying to the soul. A common activity after work is for men and/or women to gather at a pub for happy hour. This is dangerous especially when there are alcoholic drinks involved. It is not good to walk into the devil’s territory or his playground. After a few drinks, there will be suggestions or temptations because the devil prowls like a roaring lion seeking whom he can devour.
Once we are married and our spouse is our soul mate, then we need to cut our soul ties with our parents if they are manipulative or use emotional blackmail to make us do things that are detrimental to our relationship with our spouse. For those who are remarried or who have had previous relationships, it is also best to sever those soul ties with the previous partners/spouses otherwise it is unhealthy for the current marriage. It is never God’s will for us to have many marriages/relationships.
So, who is our soul mate and whom do we have soul ties with in our lives? If we want to have a fulfilling married life, we need to cut those soul ties that are not edifying to the marriage. This needs determination but the Lord is able to help us through the empowerment of the Holy Spirit. Name the person before the Lord whom you desire to sever the soul tie with.
Sermon Series: Godly or Ungodly Soul Mate / Soul Tie?
