ICS Daily Devotions
Let Your Speech be Seasoned with Salt and Always with Grace
Colossians 4:6 (NKJV) Let your speech always be with grace, seasoned with salt, that you may know how you ought to answer each one.
A husband said “I really dreaded special occasions. My wife always focused on something she was not happy about. It was as if she wanted to sabotage her birthday, Valentine’s Day, wedding anniversary or Mother’s Day celebrations. Once I had organised a big birthday celebration at the house with catering, flowers etc. and invited friends and a few neighbours that we knew. Her response after the party was, “Why did you invite that woman to my party?” Another year I could not get the type of birthday cake that she wanted as the bakery no longer made them. “Why didn’t you get the cake I like?” One time, some foie gras (gourmet food) was left on the kitchen table while I was preparing a romantic setting in the dining room. “Why are you letting the food get cold?” The list of angry rebuffs went on: “The diamonds are too small. The flowers are the wrong colour/type. The flowers had too much green in them. Is that it? Is that all I’ve got?” Everyone and everything in the house seemed to upset her. I became depressed and withdrew from the relationship which ended in a divorce”.
Although the above is a specific example, there are many similar cases out there because everyone is different. There are strengths and weaknesses in every personality. The husband in the above text is a very detailed person while the wife has a very vocal personality. The greatest fear of those who are detail-oriented is criticism. Every comment is amplified when it is uttered to a perfectionist. This man’s love language is doing something for the other person. Unfortunately, the love language wasn’t appreciated but was instead criticized. Meanwhile, the wife with the vocal personality needs to be the life of the party and has other underlying problems such as insecurity, discontentment and fear of rejection. Out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks!
Opposites are usually attracted to each other but once they are married the differences will begin to bother them, and one may feel that they never measure up to the other’s expectations. It will be even more frustrating when we try to change the other person without success. We need to remember that when we marry a person, it includes the emotional baggage in their lives as well. We should pray for them and believe that the Lord is able to bring about the change. In fact, there is no perfect marriage and there will be many adjustments throughout the whole marriage. We will truly need to walk in the Spirit and allow the fruit of the Holy Spirit to flow out of us in order for us to have the patience, kindness, goodness and self-control to work out the differences. If we apply the above scripture of “Let your speech always be with grace, seasoned with salt”, then we have to proactively bridle our tongues.We should extend grace to one another.
Instead of being critical, we need to speak words that edify and are seasoned with salt and grace to the hearer. Speak words that make the other person feel appreciated and loved for example, “Thank you, my dear. You are such a blessing. We are truly blessed to have you.” By doing so, the other person is being built up and their love reservoir is being topped up . Don’t devour one another with our words.
We are to do unto others as we want others to do unto us.
Sermon Series – Ouch! It Hurts!
