No Room for Individualism
ICS Daily Devotions
Matthew 7:25 (NKJV) “And the rain descended, the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house, and it did not fall, for it was founded on the rock.”
Today, over 50% of marriages in the world end in divorce. Laying a proper foundation is the only way to ensure that a marriage will last in spite of the challenges that come.
Many people get married for the wrong reasons, such as fear of being single, to escape from an unhappy home, a premarital pregnancy, or financial security. Those who have a negative self-image might see marriage as something that gives them a sense of worth and gives their lives meaning.
On the other hand, there are some excellent reasons to get married. For example, when both parties are convinced that it is God’s will for them to marry each other, they love each other and want to work at fulfilling each other’s needs. Once we are clear about why we want to marry a person, we should discuss the important topic of what is the definition of marriage. Do we see it as a contract or a covenant?
Many people in modern society view marriage as a social contract governed by the state and negotiated between two sovereign people who share the same bed. As such, the couple will think in terms of conditions, limits, rights, privileges, escape clauses, and even “outs”. This is why some marriages start off with a pre-nuptial agreement—a wrong start because it begins with a failure in mind. Individualism is the deathbed of every marriage.
A married couple is no longer two individuals but one flesh. When we value individualism more than a covenant marriage relationship, we will compromise to live apart in different cities or countries for a prolonged period of time. If a couple views marriage as a covenant, they should not live apart from each other, no matter how tempting the job offer is. Pursuing our own career advancement at the expense of living apart is a non-negotiable in a Christian marriage covenant because we value being together and prioritise our family above our jobs. Once we understand that everything is shared in a covenant relationship, we will lay down the need to be financially independent for the sake of security.
A marriage covenant is more about trust than terms, character than convenience, and giving than receiving. It reflects the very character of God. Therefore, we need to have the correct definition for our marriage because our behaviour will differ according to whether we view marriage as a contract or a covenant.
God’s Word has taught us that He is a covenant God. Everything He does is in accordance with His covenant promise. Therefore, we should also honour our covenant with our spouse because we are imitators of God.
Sermon Series：Before You Say I Do
